#qijiu shenanigans

[lovefrombegonia]

Shen Jiu should make dark jokes about his time as a slave but no one gets the jokes coz everyone thinks he is a spoilt young lord from a noble family.

(Except, Yue Qingyuan. He gets it. He is currently screaming, wailing inside coz sometimes SJ is a bit too detailed JUST to make him feel even MORE guilty.)

[roploem]

Some Shen Yuan Toddler AU:

What if Shen Yuan suddenly poofed into existence as a toddler in PIDW after he died?

Like, no system (because I don’t see how that would help or whatever…).

He just suddenly fell into the middle of an important Cang Qiong Peak Lord Meeting and stopped the arguing with his sudden appearance.

Everyone just freezes at the sight of some toddler sitting in the middle of their table looking dazed and confused. Everyone’s minds are going in different directions:

LQG: Demon baby!! Must kill!!

SQH: SYSTEMM!!!! THIS DIDNT HAPPEN IN MY NOVELLL!!! DONT TAKE MY POINTSSS!! THIS WASNT MY FAULTTTT!!!

SQQ: Where did this… thing… come from???

Then after the initial shock, MQF checks for injuries and demonic qi, WQW’s sword also being used to check for anything they can’t detect.

Then after all of the testing they just settle on the story the kid told them. (Which was mainly bullshitting so he doesn’t get killed.) it basically summarizes to a demon attacking his village and the demon hitting him with magic and him appearing here the next minute. (He tells them his parents died so that they don’t try and return him to some nonexistent parents)

And I imagine after that all of the peak lords slowly become more and more attached to their chronically ill mystery toddler and now all of the disciples are witnessing the Peak Lords act like divorcees who are still fighting a custody battle.

Also, I think that Shen Yuan appears a couple years before Binghe does. So when Shen yuan meets a cute little bun waiting to join Cang Qiong a few years later, he tells his guardians about him. Which makes them go into protective mode immediately.

I believe in the end there are 3 most likely candidates for Shen Yuan’s custody:

YQY: He is the sect leader….

SQH: He and the kid found out they are from the same hometown! Plus, they can speak the same language and can communicate easily!

MQF: Our poor baby has a chronic illness!! He needs to be under constant surveillance!

SQQ is close 4th, but he just isn’t that great with kids.

(The way I would kill for a fic of this, but I’m too lazy… actually… I might… idk, don’t hold me to it.)

[greeniegaes]

Triple the SHENanigans AU!

YQY comes to visit! The ghosts have varying opinion on this, PIDW!SQQ is overjoyed to be able to look at the man who risked his life for him, Shen Jiu hates him even more then before, and Shen Yuan just wants chaos!!

[levia-san]

Recently I found this old art I made for roleplaying being a fujo, while making up fake PIDW excerpts to intuit qijiu from PIDW. It was lots of fun, I hope I can find time to do it again in the future maybe.

(I did have an update ready but my laptop crashed while typing and I never recovered from that loss...)

I do remember the update starting like

"Hello my fellow sisters and brothers! I'm sorry for being MIA so long, I got into a car accident and was in a several month coma. ꃋᴖꃋ (。﹏。*)

Before continuing to some new fake 100 word fake PIDW excerpt that totally hints qijiu, trust me bro fkdjskdlkjwasd alas its lost forever forever mourining the loss

[19silvermirrors]

horseverse qijiu meeting each other😳

[touchmycoat]

my cat from hell scum villain AU; cat!SJ, owner!YQY, Jackson Galaxy!SY

[anqelbean]

'CAUSE SAYING GOODBYE IS DEATH BY A THOUSAND CUTS—

[holy--milk]

and sometimes she'll do the exact opposite

I love MXTX cause she'll write the most intricate, heart wrenching, beautiful, insanely intelligent, well written stories and then write her own Wattpad fanfics about them and slap em on as extras

[slow-reader-reads-books]

Jiuyuan (and maybe jiubingyuan) au where it's been a couple years since PIDW finished and it's getting adapted into a drama (highly altered, prob highly condensed and restructured lol) and Shen Yuan has been forced out of his NEET life and became a professional voice actor. It's often remote and he's talented at projecting all sorts of emotions so it's basically a breeze.

Eventually he becomes the go to VA for rising star Shen Jiu, no relation, and they have a cute meet cute rivalry, but slowly SJ gets attached and SY becomes the unknowing third of the qijiu relationship.

Then Shen Jiu gets cast in the upcoming PIDW adaptation as the scum villain.

Shen Yuan is desperate to get on that set, hearing Airplane will be there to offer consultation for the series. He needs to see his face as he critiques him. Insert more shenanigans here.

[levemetal]

Dual calamities Qijiu AU save me.... save me Dual Calamity Qijiu...

Yes they are wearing each other's former coats/outer layer and tons of matching accessory and garment pieces why do you ask

Details under the cut/Rambling ahead

Dual calamities AU, post pidw. SJ kills himself on the shards of Xuan Su by swallowing them. Qijiu end up entwined into one ghost amalgamation, their combined regrets hatred spite and resentment and everything creating a nearly supreme/calamity level ghost. They go off indiscriminately murdering in the demon realm in a mindless unaware rampage, consuming ghosts and demons alike and becoming stronger until they are strong enough to be aware once more.

Luo Binghe becomes aware of the new calamity too late, due to his distraction with the Bingge vs Bingmei extra happenings, and ends up regretting it as he fails to catch up to them time and time again, despite attempting to chase down the new calamity that slaughtered half the demons in a mindless rage.

It could go down the Bingqijiu path or be simply Qijiu retreating somewhere to live in peace. Maybe being annoyed later on by Hua Cheng and/or He Xuan, maybe even Bai Wuxiang once. They kick Qi Rong off a mountain once, when he comes to annoy them for the title only to prove that is not a calamity (unfortunately for him, ily stinky green ghost). SJ is gonna have the time of his life roasting his ass. Qi Rong will leave both in pieces and tears.

Their only disadvantage really is that they cannot seperate too much, physically. But I imagine after being in each other's brains after the soul merge they don't particularly care to be (nor would they want to be. This is Qijiu we're talking about.) It's Qijiu's codependant dream. Xuan Su sewed them together and actually they are very very codependant and possessive after everything so this is just fine. They probably even have a Xuan Su blood weapon, that heeds both their commands and calls. While fighting they synchronise, with YQY being the strength and SJ the brains.

I imagine YQY is able to conjure the arrows that pierced him as spiritual projectiles, and SJ chains that bound him in the water prison. Their strength was cultivated by absorbing and devouring other ghosts and demons.

@ace-shenanigans came up with the lovely title "jade dragon stalks bamboo" which is a much better title than I could ever hope to come up with. Thank you for listening to my mad ramblings

I've been wanting to draw and think on this for a while, of how grotesque to make the initial ghost + the later higher cultivation form. But basically the kiln and everything would count them as one ghost, probably a dual title too. They'd be like a myth amongst the realms, retreating to a comfortable mountain peak with bamboo, occassionally off to hunt down slavers.

[tcfactory]

Been thinking about MoShang and the question of how they would handle SQH ascending, because depending on how the world works (which we don't really know based on canon tbh) the heavens might be a completely separate plane of existence you can't easily come back from if at all. Also what about BingQiu? Bingge or Bingmei, he would raze everything to the ground, kill everyone and salt the earth if he got separated from his Shizun.

I know the easy answer is MBJ's teleportation powers or SQH pulls some author nonsense, but hear me out:

Heavenly demons are called that because they were originally kicked out of heaven. Probably primordial deities of sorts. So technically it should be possible for them to ascend again.

So clearly the best way to make MBJ eligible for ascension is to turn him into a heavenly demon. Do they borrow the heavenly aspect from LBH who can ascend either as a heavenly demon or just a regular cultivator? Do they go through a bunch of wacky hijinks ft. TLJ? (“It’s a bit like mold, divinity. You only need to give a little and if the target cultivates the right way it will spread and he will become a proper heavenly demon over time. I’ll help him get started!”) Who knows, I haven't thought that far, this idea starts and ends with 'what if heavenly demon MBJ ascending with his husband?' actually.

Also if they decide that LBH should ascend through his heavenly demon ancestry, then he would need to actually better himself and sort out all his insane neuroses which sure would be An Event. Shen Yuan trying to very belatedly instill Good Morals (any kind of morals, really) in his husband would be a trashfire. MBJ can cultivate towards detachment or something, he has the temperament for it, but LBH can't and it would bug him so much that MBJ is beating him in something. All the while TLJ is giving Advice (Wrong Answers Only) from the sidelines because he put off trying to ascend until ZZL gets reincarnated, but that doesn't mean he can't be involved in the proceedings and have fun.

And once they are all gods there can be some extra shenanigans, because I always thought that it must be one hell of a time to sort the twelve peak lords/new gods out and this batch comes with two extra. Transmigrator and Airplane reveal? Sure, why not. Shen Jiu waiting for them there because he lived Shen Yuan's life (got all the therapy he needed, bettered himself and worked off his karma) and then the universe short circuited and he got pulled back here ages ago and he's kinda pissed that his martial siblings took this long? Hell yes (QiJiu are my blorbos, Do Not Separate).

Just a whole pile of "We ascended to heaven and it was only a medium-sized disaster, actually".

[lovefrombegonia]

Shen Jiu needs to be possessive about Yue Qingyuan. After they are no longer children, if he even gets a whiff of how it feels like to be with Yue Qingyuan, I bet my life on it that he will NEVER LET HIM GO. He would rather suffocate himself and his qi-ge than tolerate anyone else even seemingly wishing to break them apart. He will destroy those people who try to do so. Pretty sure he would have wanted to raze CQMS to the ground if he found out what it did to his beloved Yue Qi. Remember his thoughts when he found out that YQY was alive. He thought to himself that he would have preferred him dead than deciding to abandon him. While I don't believe that's what he wants truly coz he did try to push YQY away in PIDW in order to save him, SJ definitely would be very protective and possessive of him. He would be drinking vinegar in gallons every time he perceives someone getting too close to the sect leader.

[horsegirlwarcrimes]

okay i absolutely HAVE to ask about "YQY and ZZLs Snadventures on Qiong Ding" 😆💚

omg hi my brother in zzl appreciation 🤝🤝🐍

this fic is my baby that i expect mmm maybe 3 people to read, but it is gonna be my next longfic after WINRN! Zhuzhi-lang finds Luo Binghe as a child and watches over him in secret. when Luo Binghe leaves for Cang Qiong, Zhuzhi-lang finds a way to assume a human shape and follow him so that he can continue to protect his cousin--only to end up accepted onto the mountain under Yue Qingyuan, the man who defeated and sealed his uncle. thus proceeds many shenanigans, disciple!Shen Yuan, Qijiu reconciliation, and Qiong Ding Peak slowly acclimated to their new martial brother who keeps unhinging his jaw to eat rats.

shared one bit here so ill drop a newer part! fic tentatively titled 'to see if i might shine'

It is on one of these ventures, letting himself drift, half-asleep, along the silty bottom of the Luo River, that Zhuzhi-lang finds a new purpose in his life.  He finds it when it crashes into him, in fact. A little body drops like a stone into the water, a tiny dark mass that Zhuzhi-lang thinks at first to be a large fish or a stray dog. Then the little body starts to flail in the water, dark hair fanning out and short limbs waving. A child.  Zhuzhi-lang is not a creature often moved to kindness. He saves his empathy sparingly, for the person who most deserves it in the world. But he is heartsick and monstrous in the river, and this creature is so small. He cannot free Junshang from his bindings, but he can save the life of this little thing.  He catches them around the chest, secures a grip with slick-scaled hands, and tosses them from the water onto the shore. They roll and curl up into a tiny dark lump, coughing up river water. There are more human children on the bank. Scruffy and scrawny but bigger than the one Zhuzhi-lang has fished out of the river. They are holding sticks, and there are thin lash marks on the pale arms of the child.  Seeing the child miraculously returned to the river bank, now pushing themselves onto hands and knees, one of the others with a stick scowls and approaches. “Hey, the dog’s been washed up. Push him again and maybe—”  Zhuzhi-lang pulls himself up onto the riverbank behind the child. He uses his arms to heave up his tail, a sheet of dark hair turned lank curtain by the water. The child he fished from the river is too busy coughing and sputtering on the ground to look around for its saviour.  The children in front of him, though, get the full view of this form. One of them whimpers. Zhuzhi-lang catches the sudden scent of urine on the wind.  He hisses, baring sharp fangs, and the children flee with shrill screams.  The half-drowned child finishes expelling water from their lungs and rolls over. Zhuzhi-lang lowers himself back down to lay flat on the ground when the other children run away, but he knows how he looks. Without Junshang’s blood keeping him stabilized and humanoid, he is a monstrosity. He expects this child, too, to scream demon and run when they realize what, exactly, has saved them from the icy Luo river.  Then large, dark eyes blink up at him. Painfully familiar eyes, in a painfully familiar small face.  The child freezes. Zhuzhi-lang freezes right back, as much from the shock of that face in miniature as for the child’s comfort. They both lay there, on the banks of the river, for a long minute, watching each other.  The child with Junshang’s eyes and Young Mistress Su’s face gingerly pulls themselves off of the ground. They kneel in the dirt in front of him. “A river monster…?” The child asks. 

thanks sm for the ask! ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

[gaywarcriminals]

hello! how are you going? do you have any svsss fic recs you enjoyed?

Aside from the usual Horrors, I'm quite well!! I hope you are too ^^

Oh wow, It's a bit hard to pick just a few because I've read a lot of SVSSS fics in the past few years, but here's the ones that came to mind/ I've been thinking about recently! (I'm excluding ones that I already recommended this week for the ask game, you can check out my "ask fish" tag to see those. Edit: I made a "fish recommends" tag too.)

Qijiu:

"i bury my voice for you" (series) by lithali. Space opera AU, Shen twins, everyone is aliens, intense qijiu longing, SJ’s unending font of angsty internal dialogue, and kinky qijiu sex feat transmasc SJ. I need more people to read this one!!!!!!!

"Palimpsest" by Azzandra. YQY loses his memories and tries to piece together how SJ fits in his life from what others tell him. I adore this fic, it's a really interesting examination of both their characters and why they love each other intrinsically. 

"You Were You, And I Was I" by MissMegh. Deaged qijiu being feral, clinging, and horny teenagers. Super cute and funny!

"what thing it is (that people most desire)" by Jinxed_Ink. A vaguely medieval AU based on an Arthurian legend where SJ disguises himself and blackmails YQY into marrying him for Revenge. SJ has Absolutely No Other Motive There. I didn't know how much I needed this particular brand of qijiu marriage shenanigans until I read it.

"I'm just as exposed (when i take off my clothes)" by owoxian. Qijjiu being weird and horny (as they deserve), being misinterpreted as abuse by accidental voyer MQF. 

"The Sect Leader’s Husband" by AMereDream. Canon divergence where YQY came back for SJ on time, and instead of becoming the QJP head disciple, SJ married YQY and became the power behind the throne. Cute power couple qijiu!!!

"The Heart Is A Sword" by Moonsheen. A-Su, a boy who is a sword, the emperor's weapon, is appointed personal attendant to the emperor's new consort Shen. PIDW post-canon.

Bingqiu:

"Rehearsal" by Prim_the_Amazing. Binghe, fresh from the abyss, uses a dream realm to run through all the ways his reunion with SQQ might go. This one is basically pure angst but it's SO good.

"How to Meal Prep - Household Tips, Recipes, and Ideas for a Better-Organised Life!" By x_los. Character study of 17-year-old preeminent housewife Binghe. It's cute, it's weird, and it's terribly tragic on account of the Dramatic Irony.

"Futility in Practice" by TGP. Time loop fic with a REALLY cool style of story telling. Repetitive but iterative text from Binghe, the non-looping character's POV as SQQ desperately tries to find the right answer to end the loop. Very angsty!

"it's not gay if you don't touch my ass ... unless?" by azunshi. Modern AU, SY wants to have sex with Binghe but ofc that would be gay, so instead he puts a cocksleeve up his ass for binghe to fuck instead. This fic is so deeply stupid (positive/complimentary), I love it, it's the exact brand of unhinged this whole fandom is slowlyy becoming.

"Songs of a Wayfarer" by foxflowering. Ballet AU with young prodigy LBH and his teacher SY! 

Binggeyuan:

"to find an intended (a bit unintentionally)" by nyoomerr. This is the classic. Wandering cultivator SY accidentally doms Bingge into being a good boy. 

"broken glass, swept away" by aaeph. Modern AU, SY buys a home only to find it haunted by the centuries old ghost of a demonic emperor. Bingge tries so hard to push SY away over and over, but SY is a stubborn man.

Jiuyuan:

"Jump To The Left" by ValiantBarnes (Cimila). I'm not sure quite how to describe this one without spoilers, but essentially, older Shen Yuan finds and saves SJ in the era he was following WYZ. SY takes SJ as a traveling companion/sort of disciple. CW for mentions of incest/psuedo-incest (no actual incest though).

"Immortal Shen Does Not Do Online Deliveries" by Anonymous. SY, a young cultivator and scholar, goes to ask the reclusive immoral master SQQ for an elixir. SQQ toys with him a little <3. Mean SQQ and flustered SY.

Gen/ No Ship:

"Rat Trap" by Azaisya. LQG & SJ. LQG and SJ are kidnapped, they get truth serum-ed, and they're forced to confront their different background and conflicting morals and methods that stem from that. I think this is my favorite execution of "LQG learns SJ's backstory and Has Regrets", because their conflict is explicitly framed as a class divide rather than just misunderstandings, and it addresses the flaws in both their resulting worldviews to some extent. 

"Sit With Your Soul" by Tossawary. SJ & SY. This is a fusion with His Dark Materials, but no knowledge is required. Basically everyone has an animal companion that's connected to and represents their soul, and SY transmigrates into SQQ's. 

[queens-of-spirits]

Some Scum Villain Fanfic Ideas I’ve Got Stewing:

(These are all Bingqiu and Moshang becuase with maybe background Qijiu because those are my ships)

In no particular order:

Binghe’s mother(s) are/is given the chance to see how her son grew up via time travel system shenanigans and SQQ being given a “meet the mother-in-law” quest

A moshang version of the questionnaire extra

My take on the Bingmei vs Bingge extra, where they each have a system and have to stay in each other’s worlds for a week (this believe it or not came about before I knew this extra existed)

Hades and Persephone au with LBH as Hades and SQQ as Persephone

An au where everything is the same, but SQQ is a vampire

An mpreg fic where the demons are the ones pregnant for once (I have scenes for this already written). Contains a sequel idea where Bingqiu’s daughter ends up meeting Bingge

It turns out that all of the Shen siblings are anime-esque protagonists and the three left in his old world realize SY transmigrated and use magic to track him down and reunite

SY gets sent back to his old world and LBH comes to get him, hilarity and angst ensue.

Og!MBJ swaps places with the svsss version and is very confused. Leads into a sequel where pre-transmigration versions of SQQ and SQH are kidnapped and effectively seduced by the PIDW boys

My take on an A/B/O au

LBH tries to become Bingpup to get closer to SQQ post abyss, becomes a giant wolf instead. He still gets adopted and an identity reveal ensues

An intense harem selection au where SQQ wins before it even starts

Probably like 80 more, I love this series

Let me know if you have a favourite I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[10thmusemoon]

what would your qijiu baby shen yuan omegaverse au look like in a world where YQY came back for sj in time/already told him the truth about Xuan Su years ago? Im so sorry but the concept of qijiu baby sy just has its hooks deep in my heart...

So I’ve already started writing a version of this where they reunite at the IAC but SJ assumes yqy was kept at CQMS because of his omega status (not completely wrong but one of the factors) and is more understanding of it. Their teen romance is met with the barrier of everyone around them caring too much about impropriety so they sneak around and eventully get together organically. It helps that they are immediately marked down as each others heat/rut partners. Originally they planned on marrying right before their peak lord ascension but the sect pushes it until afterwards for the optics of two peak lords being this united blah blah blah

In this version, I’m certain SY would be raised to be a QDP disciple because SQQ is going to make sure his spawn inherits the most power possible. Also he can be as terrible to his own disciples without SY’s soft heart getting in the way. However, being the nerd he is, SY spends as much times on QJP as he can get away with, rifling through the bestiaries that just can’t be found on CQMS. It becomes clear to QiJiu that this kid is Not gonna wanna be sect leader and it's a well worn argument between them.

(alternatively in the world of the father oh father fic he'd joing QJP because SJ is trying very hard to impress him and worm his way into his affections without having QDP poison SY against him.)

Binghe still joins under QJP and everything goes like it normally would until SY realizes he missed the protagonist joining the sect and suddenly pivots to spending 75% of his time there. SQQ is pleased and suspicious of this in turn until he realizes SY has taken LBH on as a pet project.

(there's a furtive discussion between qijiu that they should have let SY keep at least one of the injured monsters he's brought over the years 'this is your fault qi-ge' 'xiao jiu i'm allergic-' 'then die!')

meanwhile binghe is on his very best behavior trying to win over his in-laws. I haven't decided, but there's no abyss arc here some other shenanigans happen as a result of SY and SQH figuring each other out years before.